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Searching for family

arcs is an independent community agency specialising in the field of adoption. We are unique in that we work with all parties affected by adoption - parents, adopted people, adoptive parents and extended family.

arcs is experienced in assisting people considering search from all over world who are affected by adoption. 

Fears and concerns about searching?

In our work with adopted people, parents and their relatives, we have found there to be common fears and concerns:

  • Rejection or being " too much" 
  • Feeling disloyal to family 
  • Not knowing your place in the new relationship 
  • Being seen by others as ungrateful and disloyal
  • Not feeling like you have anything in common 
  • Uncertainty about how to talk to your other family members about your decision to search

When is a good time?

Everyone is unique and at any stage in life it can become very important to find out more about your family or to access personal, family and medical history.

However there are many triggers that can lead people to come and see us.

Often this can be a particular life event such as the dynamics arising in a new relationship, an upcoming marriage, the birth of a child or the death of a parent. These events can bring issues related to connection and belonging up to the surface.

Feelings of confusion and strong feelings around loss can arise at these times, along with wonderings about the other's experience. Sometimes these emotions lead to a desire to search and let the other know you are safe and well and also to discover what has happened in their life.

arcs can assist with

  • providing a safe supportive counselling relationship within which to acknowledge, explore and navigate current circumstances
  • helping to gather information
  • helping you to make decisions about the best way forward for you 
  • supporting your search
  • preparing for the possibility of reunion: we believe that good preparation is the foundation for the best possible future relationships
  • making the first contact and providing an intermediary service if required
  • in developing new relationships
  • helping to nurture existing relationships

arcs therapeutic counsellors are experienced in supporting clients considering searching for family.